Some avoid disagreements entirely, treating harmony as the ultimate goal. Others lean into conflict, speaking plainly but burning bridges in the process.

Neither extreme serves us well. As organisations become more collaborative and cross-functional, the ability to disagree constructively has become a critical skill, one that protects relationships while advancing ideas.

In fact, research from Stanford University suggests that teams that embrace healthy conflict perform better than teams that avoid disagreement altogether (Stanford GSB).

This matters across all professions, but nowhere more so than in public relations, where your work depends on earning trust, building influence, and managing delicate relationships.

The art of disagreeing without damaging relationships

At its heart, disagreement should be about exchanging ideas, not defeating an opponent.

That mindset shift alone can transform difficult conversations.

Before you respond next time, ask yourself: Am I disagreeing to prove my point, or am I helping both of us think more clearly about the issue?

When your goal is clarity and shared understanding rather than simply winning, your tone and tactics naturally shift.

Here are practical ways anyone can disagree without harming relationships, and how they apply directly in PR and communications.

Show respect and curiosity from the outset

Respect is the foundation of any constructive disagreement. It signals that you value the other person, not just their opinion, but their role, their experience, their perspective. And curiosity? That’s what keeps the door open.

When you approach a disagreement with curiosity instead of defensiveness, it changes everything. Try simple phrases like:

“That’s an interesting take, can I offer another angle?”
“Can you talk me through your thinking on that?”

These aren’t just polite. They show you’re listening to understand, not just waiting for your turn to speak.

Shalini Gupta, Head of Internal Communications – UK, India, Middle East and Africa at Arup, puts it this way:

“We’re in the business of connection. Respectful disagreement becomes possible when people feel safe, heard and conversations stay anchored to a shared goal, just from different angles. Internal comms teams are often the bridge between what needs to be said and what’s hard to say. We create space for challenge by nurturing a culture that values both transparency and progress.”

That mindset is especially important in PR and communications, where relationships are your capital. Whether you’re advising a client, collaborating with colleagues, or managing up, the way you challenge ideas matters as much as the ideas themselves.

Lead with curiosity, and you’ll often find less resistance and more room to move forward, together.

Use “I” framing, but keep focus on outcomes

“I” statements help reduce escalation by framing your views as personal perspectives rather than universal truths.

“I’m not sure I agree,  can we walk through the reasoning together?” invites collaboration.

This is true whether you’re discussing politics over dinner or debating media strategy with a client.

In communications work, you might say: “I understand the desire for a fast turnaround, but my experience suggests this needs a longer lead time to land well with journalists.”

This ensures you are contributing constructively, not simply criticising.

Find common ground before expressing disagreement

Every disagreement contains at least some shared ground. Acknowledging it early helps shift the tone from adversarial to collaborative.

In any professional context, you could say: “I think we’re aiming for the same outcome, but I’d take a different path.”

In PR, where reputation and relationships are at stake, this framing is especially valuable. For example: “We all want to strengthen the brand’s position in this market, I have a slightly different take on how to approach that.”

This signals alignment on goals, even when methods differ.

Ask thoughtful questions that unlock understanding

One of the fastest ways to lower the heat in a disagreement is to ask a genuine, open question:
“What’s driving that view for you?” or
“What would success look like to you in this situation?”

Too often, we listen just long enough to prepare our rebuttal. Thoughtful questioning encourages active listening and slows the conversation down, creating space for clarity.

In PR, this is invaluable. When clients insist on a risky tactic, a well-timed question can help them reflect:
“What’s the key message we want stakeholders to take away from this?”

Avoid common traps: absolutes, personal attacks, and anecdotes as proof

PR people are wordsmiths, but even pros can fall into rhetorical traps.

Absolutes like “You always…” or “That never works…” shut down dialogue immediately.

Attacking the person rather than the idea (“You’re not experienced enough to understand this media landscape”) damages trust, even if unintended.

And beware of anecdotal “proof”, your client’s competitor may have succeeded with a particular tactic, but that doesn’t mean it’s right for this brief.

Focus instead on data and shared objectives:
“The coverage we’ve seen over the last six months suggests that journalists are fatigued with this narrative, could we test a fresh angle?”

Mind your tone, body language, and medium

Tone is as important as content. Even a perfectly reasoned argument will fall flat if delivered with sarcasm or impatience. Watch non-verbal cues: posture, facial expressions and vocal tone can convey unintended judgment.

And consider the medium. A disagreement handled poorly over email or Slack can escalate unnecessarily. Sometimes a quick call or an in-person conversation helps ensure tone and intent are clear.

In high-pressure moments, it’s okay to pause:
“This is an important decision. Could we take a short break and revisit this in half an hour?”

That pause can help reset emotions and allow for more thoughtful discussion.

Preserve relationships even when agreement isn’t possible

Not every disagreement can be resolved on the spot. Sometimes, you simply reach different conclusions, and that’s fine.

The key is to end well, leaving the relationship intact and future collaboration possible.

“We seem to be prioritising different things,  can we agree on immediate next steps and revisit this later if needed?” preserves goodwill.

For PR professionals, this is essential: your reputation depends on being both candid and constructive, able to challenge while remaining trusted.

In an era where consensus can sometimes stifle creativity, your ability to disagree constructively is part of what makes you valuable as an adviser.

Handled well, a disagreement becomes an opportunity to sharpen thinking, build credibility, and help clients or teams achieve better outcomes.

So disagree when you need to,  but do it in a way that strengthens relationships rather than burning them.

Curzon PR is a London-based PR firm working with clients globally. If you have any questions, please feel free to contact our Business Development Team bd@curzonpr.com